Well, shoot, you’re a vampire now, that’s embarrassing. How do you feel about it?

>It bites

Oh, you’re a funny one, that’s good, you’ll need that sense of humor. You’ve got a lot of time to fill now. Guess you’d better start figuring out your situation.

>drink blood

Jumping right in, I see. Cool, cool. What blood, chief?


you have: no blood

>get blood

What, from the ground?


You’re waist deep in a well. You can just see the moon way way up at the top of the well. You don’t know how you got here, but it’s probably pretty good you’re immortal, because that fall looks pretty bad. Oh, and the well is full of blood. That’s convenient.

>drink blood from well

Now you’re getting it! Okay, you drink the blood. It’s pretty gross and you don’t like it!


I hear you.

>climb well

The stones are far too slippery to climb.


Summoning every ounce of your undead strength, you leap with all your might. You maybe get up to your knees before splashing back into the blood pool.

>turn into a bat

You think about it really hard and come to the conclusion you have no idea how to do that.

>turn into mist

Oh, you’re a reader, too! That’s great! It doesn’t work, but keep at it for a couple of centuries, maybe you’ll figure it out.


Want a hint?


There’s no way out of this well, I’m afraid. This isn’t a puzzle so much as a philosophical conundrum. What good is eternal life if it consists of nothing but survival? Looks like you’re going to find out the long way!


Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha