I Play the Ecordian

With aplogies [sic] to Jim Theis

It was out east, somewhere in Asia Minor, I don’t remember where exactly — who can remember all those fiddly little kingdoms? It’s all I can do to keep the cities straight. Oh, and Egypt. Everyone knows Egypt. — anyway, Asia Minor somewhere, round where that slut Zagreus is from, and we were coming back towards Hellas, the three of us, and stopped off in this rinky-dink little city because there looked to be some kind of a do in the works.

“What’s the to-do, bub?” Oicles said that — he died later — but he was a good guy.

“Oh, the king’s sacrificing his daughter to the Horselord, trying to get rid of this leviathan that’s been plaguing us lately.” He shrugged. “Don’t know that it’ll work. Horselord’s mighty fickle.”

Telamon laughed. “Hell of a way to run a family.”

Well, that put it to me, and I’ve never been really big on the whole kinslaying thing, no matter what stories you might have heard — haven’t I done enough? Can’t I ever forget? — and I don’t know that just because it’s necessary makes it right. I thought Orestes had the right end of the idea, poor dumb kid, him with his madness and his whips of scorpions. So we went and we rescued the girl, sorry, woman I should say, her being all of thirty and sort of set in her ways, no thanks we got from king or family, I should say; in the end we killed her father and brothers and only stopped because we ran out of people to kill.

None of it our idea, of course, but you can never tell how people are going to run when the gods get up on them. He’s not called the Horselord for nothing.